What’s with a name? Plenty – especially when it comes to horse racing. Common sense dictates you don’t give a manly horse a frilly name, or give it a monicker so obscene punters might even blush as they bet on your horse.
That Nut, Andy
Take the example of Andy Hillis. He named his racehorse Nutzapper, in honor of a male contraceptive. In justifying the name to the Jockey Club, he said that as a young boy living in Canada, he enjoyed zapping walnuts in boiling oil before sprinkling these on salads. The club approved the name. Hillis, however, could not keep the news to himself and boasted about his horse’s name to a reporter. Within 48 hours of Hillis’ interview, the name Nutzapper was barred; and now, the odds of Nutzapper ever running in the Kentucky Derby is about one in a thousand.
Clearly, it doesn’t pay to be too creative with names – not when it concerns your race horse, anyway. After all, the sobriquet you give your thoroughbred must be audience and billboard-friendly. Monickers like Pneumoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is simply asking for trouble. So are the names Gay-and-Loving-It and Chlamydia. Then too, there is the Jockey Club to think about. In fact, above all, there is the Jockey Club to think about.
Equine Baptism
Jockey Club? What club, and who died and left it in charge of naming horses? the Jockey Club is a 103-year-old organization that has the power to sign off on all horse names. Its main role is as keeper of the American Stud Book. Thus, if you want to breed an Arabian or enter it in races, you must first get the club’s nod. In addition to approving horse names, the club is also responsible for backing equine research and managing tons of statistical resources. So, if you want to know more about the different horse racing systems in the world or find out how these evolved, the Jockey Club is the organization to ask.
Spank It and Other Strange Monickers
The odd thing is, if Hillis had not crowed to a tabloid about getting away with the monicker Nutzapper, his horse might still have kept the rights to being Nutzapper and entering the derby. As careful as the Jockey Club tries to be, a lot of names slip their vigilance. Glaring examples include Date More Minors, Spank It, Blow Me, Sexual Harassment, and even Pussy Galore. If you want to avoid grief from the club, here’s a simple horse racing tip in naming your thoroughbred. The name must not violate a copyright, or have obvious commercial undertones, or be that of an infamous person. Furthermore, it must not be offensive to religious, political, or ethnic groups. Oh, and for the sake of the general public’s tongue, all names must not have more than 18 characters. That said, there certainly is no reason not to name your horse ControlXYZ.
